Skip to main content

i am grateful for LOVE: part deux 11.12.13



yesterday, i posted this status on facebook:

"i love my single life and i am grateful to have peace in abundance. our relationship status does not define who we are. my worth is not measured by external conditions, terms or symbols. i am the i am of myself. i alone am enough."
and oh, how was i surprised by the likes and responses. and then it dawned on me---- maybe, just maybe there are more single people who are content with being single than i realize. i believe this resonated with people because they too have found some kind of solace in being single.

now by nature, i love solitude. nothing moves me more than being alone, except maybe jazz or a beautiful arrangement of white hydrangas or dinner at my favorite local restaurant, The Parlor Market. my creativity flourishes when i can have that. however, i also love people. i'm interested in them and their experiences because i realize that we all can be teachers for one another. 

 so i wanted to delve further into what the truth of that status represented. although i consider myself open and authenticity is a guiding principle in my life, i don't always discuss my love life-- the hurts, the lessons, the disappointments, the could've's, should've's, and wtf's. 

 at one point, i became completely depressed because of the state of my love life. i interrogated and asked myself, why is it that here at 25 i have never been in a relationship. yes, this guy was nice over here, this one a promising politician and/or future business maverick, so on and so forth. but i couldn't get the commitment. i just knew something was wrong. with. me. 

 i knew it wasn't the looks. i knew it wasn't the intellect. i knew it wasn't the humor. i say that as honestly and  humbly as i know how, but i do know my worth and my selling points. 

one night, while in prayer, i simply got the answer to my conundrum... 

 "You are single because it will take a special person to love you." 
From that moment on, i surrendered. i knew then that i needed to focus on my Job, with a capital j (that's what i like to call purpose). i knew i needed to continue to live a full life. i knew that essentially nothing is wrong with me and that i don't have to live in fear of being alone forever. when the time comes, he will come. but for right now, i am surrounded by so much love that some days i just can't take it. i have the most wonderful family and friends whom i adore. i have my work, spiritual anthropology. i have a new job at a little fine dining restaurant here in Fondren. 

my life is good. i am blessed. my cup runneth over. 

right now, Tony Bennett and Bill Evans' Young and Foolish is playing (one of my favorite records ever). it's early morning and i'm about to meditate with Oprah and Deepak (if you haven't signed up, please do so by visiting Chopra Center Meditation) 

i am grateful for all the love in my life and for being single and for knowing that i still matter. hear me when i say this, you alone are enough. you being single is not a curse, it's a blessing. use this time to better yourself. work out, learn some french, go out on dates, and learn what makes you feel sexy and do it. do it for yourself. 

love yourself with abandon. 
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

your life is sacred: honoring every moment

on this day, exactly eleven years ago today, my mother entered the Baptist for her second mastectomy. the cancer was vicious, relentless, and evidently insatiably hungry for the life of my mother. She had already had the other breast removed and she went into this surgery confident that it would be best.  i remember her strength and her faith most vividly during this week. i also remember her strongly rejecting my request for funds to purchase a new shirt for the pastor's appreciation that was coming up that Friday. i'm not sure if my mother knew this was her last week on earth. there were no "final conversations" or any discussion of what was next for our lives without her.  she would leave behind her four children, her dreams, and ultimately, a life well-lived that same night of the pastor's appreciation, which also happened to be All Saints Day. my mother's life, her struggle with breast cancer, and her early demise at thirty-three helps def...
2 comments
Read more

summer GROWTH

       you know growing up, one of the things i always looked forward to was the summertime. not only because of the time out of school, but because i thought summer was a time to grow -- physically. in the fall, I would be amazed at how much taller my peers had grown. Apparently, the summer wasn't as giving to me.       nowadays, i still think of the summer as a time of growth but on a whole other level... mentally. every summer, i set a goal to read at least 100 books (don't ask me if they all get read), i watch documentaries and do other mind stimulating activities. however, i still give myself all of the rest and relaxation I need.      one thing i am certain of is this, you may not be able to control your physical growth, but you can control growth in other areas of your life. mental, spiritual, and financial growth, to name a few, also takes time, but they depend solely on you. where ar...
2 comments
Read more